The Harvest We Reap with Our Families by Ayal Hurst
When we incarnate into a life, it is said that we choose our parents. It is also said that we loop around with the same souls with whom we still have contracts of karma to fulfill, over and over again. Why is this so, when so often it can seem so hard?
Some people say:”I NEVER chose THOSE people as my family!” But, I think that it is so, and this is why:
I was sent a wonderful e-mail recently called “The Purpose of a Dog”, where a young boy is present while his beloved dog of many years is being put to rest due to cancer. The end of the story goes like this:
The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives.
Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ''I know why.''
Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try to live.
He said, ''People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?'' The Six-year-old continued,
'Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.”
I share this because, as I understand it, the purpose of a family is to help us in this epic, challenging process of learning to love. Usually, though not always, when one is born into a family, you don’t or can’t easily divorce form it, though sometimes that does happen. Generally speaking however, we have and are entwined with the members of our family For Life. Through all the good and the bad, the sweet moments, the upsets, the wonders and the woundings, the support and the disappointments. Through it all, because they ARE family, and the Love binds one, for all the years of one’s life, in one way or another, we learn, sometimes grudgingly, to work it out, to forgive one another for the wounds and hurts along the way, and we come to a much greater understanding of the trials and tribulations another has to go through on this epic journey we call Life. Unlike a dog, it takes us a LONG time, it seems, to learn how to do this. But because there is that innate spark of love, sometimes hidden, yet there, deep down, glowing among members of a family, we hang in there. From the first moment a parent gazes upon their infant child, or the child gazes up into the eyes of his or her parent, something bursts out of us, and that spark ignites, never ever to be truly extinguished. Sometimes it only bursts through, for some, at the moment of death. But it was there all along. And so, we begin to learn about love.
It takes a LOT to learn about love. In fact, it takes many, many Lifetimes – we spend lifetime after lifetime, day after day, moment by moment building up the Love Muscle Power until we are finally able to not lift that final weight, but let go of the weight of all the burdens and fermenting thoughts and hurts that have bound us, tightening up our muscles until sometimes we can hardly breathe. We let go of all of that weight, all of that constriction of anger, fear, and hopelessness – an unnecessary burden - and we learn to love unconditionally, without expectation that someone else be what we want for them to be so that we feel safe or validated; we learn to love without dependency, so that we are directly, finally, fully connected to our own Center, our own Source of Divine Power and what is called Inner Authority. We learn how not to be needy, or critical, vengeful, or withdrawn. We learn how to honor the amazing and vast journey someone else must make and the roads they must travel, without interfering with, harming, or violating that journey or that person in any way. We learn to allow love to EXIST IN FREEDOM – but that learning, as I said, takes a long time – like little drops of water falling from the roof of a cave whose ceiling is so high that you can’t even see it, millennium after millennium, until finally a beautiful stalagtite is formed – a thing of translucent wonder and beauty.
In the meantime, being with your family is not the journey of dancing through the roses one thinks, often, that it is supposed to be. It is an arduous and difficult and thorny task, at times. I call it GROUND ZERO. It is where all of your most troubling and devastating issues and pain will show up. It is where the blast of feeling utterly wounded and devastated – not always – but generally speaking – will go off. The reason this is so is because those members of your family are dedicated souls who love you so much that they have agreed to help you on your way – doing so, very often, by taking on and playing a hard and challenging role in your life. It’s not easy to take on such a role, but it is done out of – on the soul level – a deep and abiding love. There are other factors involved as well – unresolved karma, etc. But, our families act as mirrors and messengers and teachers for us, showing us the same issues in themselves, as well as the same strengths and wonderful qualities, that we have come in to work on, or be able to accept and find, in ourselves. That is so often why it can be so hard to see troubling areas in our family, flaws, we might even call them, because we, too, have that same issue, and we, too, have come in to learn from it, to grow beyond it, to heal it, and to gain compassion and strength and courage for ourselves – and others, as we do so, along the way.
When we can be so forgiving and compassionate within ourselves that we can look upon ourselves and our yet to be healed areas with understanding and love, then we become an open book to others. Nothing can deflate us or injure us, because we have nothing to hide - we know what we are here to do. Since there is nothing to hide, we move into Trust. When we move into Trust, we move into Gratitude. We come to understand and honor that all that happens along this vast and epic journey called our life is here for our growth – our evolution. It is all part of the Dharma we are here to do. Our Soul Mission to ourselves, helped along the way by many, many other souls. Our family primary amongst them. And when we can have that level of openness and vulnerability – the true strength of this kind of open, loving, trusting vulnerability – then we have Awakened, with eyes wide open, and we also gaze at others with that same compassion and unconditional love. THAT is the goal.
So, when we are in the midst of some seemingly agonizing or challenging situation with our families, if we can turn our soulful eyes upon the moment, and see it as a moment, an opportunity for this Grace to emerge – an opportunity to give and receive Love – and we see the part that all the players involved have a hand in bringing it about - then there ceases to be any fear or woundedness. We see our families as the messengers that they are – those who are helping to bring to us this important message of growth – helping us to see it and work through it, and move beyond it to a greater field of light.
We have all heard the expression:
DON’T SHOOT THE MESSENGER!
Therefore, I invite you to enjoy the Harvest that your families bring to you – shift your perception and see with the eyes and heart of the soul. When in the grip of a difficult moment, ask yourself:
WHAT IS THE BRILLIANCE AND PURPOSE OF THIS EXPERIENCE THAT MY SOUL HAS CREATED FOR ME? And see how your family, or anyone else, is playing an important part in your soul play, to help you become a triumphant star.
Ayal Hurst is a Spiritual Counselor and Shamanic Practitioner, Holistic Healer, Master Hypnotherapist, Energy Worker, and Reiki Master, facilitating individuals to find, explore, and heal areas of their life that seem troubling, challenging, or unworkable. She teaches how we create our own reality, and how to release and transform the old, limiting programs and energetic patterns locked within into health and success. She specializes in helping others realize their true, fulfilling potential.
Ayal has over 30 years of experience working with individuals and groups, bringing knowledge, empowerment and transformation to many. As co-facilitator of the Council of Women Programs, Ayal has served hundreds of women through Women's Councils (inspiring weekend retreats held world-wide), and Sacred Gatherings.
You can visit her website where she answers questions on personal healing from people all over the word at www.trans4mind.com/healing
Or, contact her for a personal healing session at 843/577-2821 [email protected]
When we incarnate into a life, it is said that we choose our parents. It is also said that we loop around with the same souls with whom we still have contracts of karma to fulfill, over and over again. Why is this so, when so often it can seem so hard?
Some people say:”I NEVER chose THOSE people as my family!” But, I think that it is so, and this is why:
I was sent a wonderful e-mail recently called “The Purpose of a Dog”, where a young boy is present while his beloved dog of many years is being put to rest due to cancer. The end of the story goes like this:
The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives.
Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ''I know why.''
Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try to live.
He said, ''People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?'' The Six-year-old continued,
'Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.”
I share this because, as I understand it, the purpose of a family is to help us in this epic, challenging process of learning to love. Usually, though not always, when one is born into a family, you don’t or can’t easily divorce form it, though sometimes that does happen. Generally speaking however, we have and are entwined with the members of our family For Life. Through all the good and the bad, the sweet moments, the upsets, the wonders and the woundings, the support and the disappointments. Through it all, because they ARE family, and the Love binds one, for all the years of one’s life, in one way or another, we learn, sometimes grudgingly, to work it out, to forgive one another for the wounds and hurts along the way, and we come to a much greater understanding of the trials and tribulations another has to go through on this epic journey we call Life. Unlike a dog, it takes us a LONG time, it seems, to learn how to do this. But because there is that innate spark of love, sometimes hidden, yet there, deep down, glowing among members of a family, we hang in there. From the first moment a parent gazes upon their infant child, or the child gazes up into the eyes of his or her parent, something bursts out of us, and that spark ignites, never ever to be truly extinguished. Sometimes it only bursts through, for some, at the moment of death. But it was there all along. And so, we begin to learn about love.
It takes a LOT to learn about love. In fact, it takes many, many Lifetimes – we spend lifetime after lifetime, day after day, moment by moment building up the Love Muscle Power until we are finally able to not lift that final weight, but let go of the weight of all the burdens and fermenting thoughts and hurts that have bound us, tightening up our muscles until sometimes we can hardly breathe. We let go of all of that weight, all of that constriction of anger, fear, and hopelessness – an unnecessary burden - and we learn to love unconditionally, without expectation that someone else be what we want for them to be so that we feel safe or validated; we learn to love without dependency, so that we are directly, finally, fully connected to our own Center, our own Source of Divine Power and what is called Inner Authority. We learn how not to be needy, or critical, vengeful, or withdrawn. We learn how to honor the amazing and vast journey someone else must make and the roads they must travel, without interfering with, harming, or violating that journey or that person in any way. We learn to allow love to EXIST IN FREEDOM – but that learning, as I said, takes a long time – like little drops of water falling from the roof of a cave whose ceiling is so high that you can’t even see it, millennium after millennium, until finally a beautiful stalagtite is formed – a thing of translucent wonder and beauty.
In the meantime, being with your family is not the journey of dancing through the roses one thinks, often, that it is supposed to be. It is an arduous and difficult and thorny task, at times. I call it GROUND ZERO. It is where all of your most troubling and devastating issues and pain will show up. It is where the blast of feeling utterly wounded and devastated – not always – but generally speaking – will go off. The reason this is so is because those members of your family are dedicated souls who love you so much that they have agreed to help you on your way – doing so, very often, by taking on and playing a hard and challenging role in your life. It’s not easy to take on such a role, but it is done out of – on the soul level – a deep and abiding love. There are other factors involved as well – unresolved karma, etc. But, our families act as mirrors and messengers and teachers for us, showing us the same issues in themselves, as well as the same strengths and wonderful qualities, that we have come in to work on, or be able to accept and find, in ourselves. That is so often why it can be so hard to see troubling areas in our family, flaws, we might even call them, because we, too, have that same issue, and we, too, have come in to learn from it, to grow beyond it, to heal it, and to gain compassion and strength and courage for ourselves – and others, as we do so, along the way.
When we can be so forgiving and compassionate within ourselves that we can look upon ourselves and our yet to be healed areas with understanding and love, then we become an open book to others. Nothing can deflate us or injure us, because we have nothing to hide - we know what we are here to do. Since there is nothing to hide, we move into Trust. When we move into Trust, we move into Gratitude. We come to understand and honor that all that happens along this vast and epic journey called our life is here for our growth – our evolution. It is all part of the Dharma we are here to do. Our Soul Mission to ourselves, helped along the way by many, many other souls. Our family primary amongst them. And when we can have that level of openness and vulnerability – the true strength of this kind of open, loving, trusting vulnerability – then we have Awakened, with eyes wide open, and we also gaze at others with that same compassion and unconditional love. THAT is the goal.
So, when we are in the midst of some seemingly agonizing or challenging situation with our families, if we can turn our soulful eyes upon the moment, and see it as a moment, an opportunity for this Grace to emerge – an opportunity to give and receive Love – and we see the part that all the players involved have a hand in bringing it about - then there ceases to be any fear or woundedness. We see our families as the messengers that they are – those who are helping to bring to us this important message of growth – helping us to see it and work through it, and move beyond it to a greater field of light.
We have all heard the expression:
DON’T SHOOT THE MESSENGER!
Therefore, I invite you to enjoy the Harvest that your families bring to you – shift your perception and see with the eyes and heart of the soul. When in the grip of a difficult moment, ask yourself:
WHAT IS THE BRILLIANCE AND PURPOSE OF THIS EXPERIENCE THAT MY SOUL HAS CREATED FOR ME? And see how your family, or anyone else, is playing an important part in your soul play, to help you become a triumphant star.
Ayal Hurst is a Spiritual Counselor and Shamanic Practitioner, Holistic Healer, Master Hypnotherapist, Energy Worker, and Reiki Master, facilitating individuals to find, explore, and heal areas of their life that seem troubling, challenging, or unworkable. She teaches how we create our own reality, and how to release and transform the old, limiting programs and energetic patterns locked within into health and success. She specializes in helping others realize their true, fulfilling potential.
Ayal has over 30 years of experience working with individuals and groups, bringing knowledge, empowerment and transformation to many. As co-facilitator of the Council of Women Programs, Ayal has served hundreds of women through Women's Councils (inspiring weekend retreats held world-wide), and Sacred Gatherings.
You can visit her website where she answers questions on personal healing from people all over the word at www.trans4mind.com/healing
Or, contact her for a personal healing session at 843/577-2821 [email protected]